It often feels unfair to me, to be the one left behind. Finding my way through each day is difficult enough, living my life in a manner worthy of Zach is often the biggest challenge I face in a given week. I was always more serious than he, and without being blessed with the same rare, clever wit, I have to work much harder to find the joy in things. And now in his absence, I no longer benefit from the example Zach set daily.
Sometimes I go to my bed and cry
Sometimes when I miss Derek I go to my bed and cry on my pillow and sometimes I get on mommy’s lap.
Holding my pillow
Sometimes holding my pillow and looking at a tee shirt that I made him. That is what makes me feel better.
Now I don’t have any brothers
I miss having him as my only brother. Now I have to sit in a house with no other boys around. Just a bunch of girls trying to torture me.
We all believed in God and prayed for my sister to get better. We always prayed to get this sickness away from her and she would be better and happy. It turned out the other way and sometimes we think that God didn’t do the right thing by helping her but it’s not really his fault. She was just really ill and sick and she couldn’t really take all the pain, so He took her to a better place.
It’s not easy to forget
It’s not easy to forget a sister or a brother because your life completely changes. My sister was a great person and she was always there for us. You wake up one morning and you don’t see her there. You really miss her a lot. Your whole life is changing and everything is different now. Your family is changing all around because everyone is so sad that a sister and a daughter could pass away.