More than anything, my friends and family have been there. They’ve made it clear that they don’t look at me any differently for being overweight. They understand the typical stuff: the times when I was getting out of breath, they would wait for me, and they’d be like, “Come on. Come on.” And there’s always someone there to exercise with me or play tennis with me. More than anything, during the periods when it’s easy to get down, having somebody there to smile and talk with is important.
Talking to friends about weight
I don’t really talk about my weight a lot with my friends. And they don’t really see it as a problem or hold it against me. Sometimes I’ll talk about it and tell them it really sucks and that they’re lucky they’re not big. It really makes me mad when they’re like, “Oh, I’m so fat,” and they’re like a size two.
Confronting friends
I talk to my friends about my weight, but not seriously. All my friends are within the ideal weight range, but they’re always saying, “I’m so fat. I can’t believe I’m so fat.” I’ll sit there think, “You’re not fat– look at me.” So I’ll confront them and say, “If you think you’re fat, what about me?” But other than that, we don’t really touch the subject of weight, because it’s not really important to us.
Shopping with friends
I’ve found a couple of stores where I can shop without a problem. But I can’t just go into a store where my friends shop and buy clothes, because they don’t fit me. So unless I go shopping with someone my size, I don’t really go shopping. I mean, I might go shopping with people, but I don’t ever buy clothes. It’s definitely hard to find clothes that fit, especially stylish clothes. I don’t want to wear old lady clothes just because they fit.
I just tell my friends that I think the changes I made are better for me. If I hadn’t done this [weight loss plan] before I grew up, I might be a little fatter. But also, in the long run, because I’m doing this, I’ll be thinner than all of my friends. They eat a lot now and they don’t get fat, but when they get older they might gain weight. I just tell them that it’s better for them if they do this, but they don’t have to. I chose it.
Feeling left out
My weight has gotten in the way a lot. It’s been hard making friends at school, playing sports, and doing things that a lot of my friends do. There are some things that I can’t do with them, like sports practices, going for a run, or meeting friends somewhere. It’s hard to be there when I can’t do those kinds of things.
Close friends
Most of my friends are very close, so they all know about my situation. They are like my mom– always helping me and supporting me.
I can change it
At first, like any other kid who was teased, I got upset but didn’t think that I could do anything about it. Now it doesn’t make a difference to me whether they tease me or not. I know that I can change it if I want to. I can change it, and I’m trying to now.
I have never been teased because I have a lot of friends. I’m friendly with everyone, so I don’t think anyone would want to hurt my feelings. But still I feel … I know that they know I have changed. I still feel that people are saying things about me gaining weight.
Falling behind
My weight has gotten in the way of my doing a lot of things that my friends do, like sports. When I was younger I used to play softball a lot, but it was always hard because even at practice I couldn’t run like everyone else. I couldn’t run a lap around the field because I would get out of breath. I had friends who would walk with me because they knew I couldn’t run it, but it’s always hard when everybody around you can do things and you can’t. Like at school in gym we have to do these physical fitness tests, and normally I can never come near the requirements. It’s always hard when you know that everybody else can do it and you can’t.
Including myself
I don’t really like to exclude myself from what’s going on, so if I’m out with my friends, I’m not going to go to a different place to eat, but I’m also not going to choose something that’s bad. If they’re getting fried food, I might get a sandwich or something that I think is a better choice, but I’m not going to exclude myself from what they’re doing and go to a different restaurant just because they don’t have salads or something.